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06 Dec '10

CHRISTMAS SHIPPING

Posted by Michael Starke

Dear all Christmas shoppers,

Terrence is proud to let you know that all online orders are guaranteed to be shipped the next business day through Australia Post.

This means that barring natural disaster, all online orders received before the 22nd of December will arrive before Christmas.

Remember, the earlier the better, so beat those cyber queue's and avoid the rush for Terrence!


Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Terrence Towel

06 Dec '10

Sack Up - Orders are despatched next day!!

Posted by Michael Starke

Christmas is all about giving…

The tree is set and neatly decorated in the corner of the room, a string hangs in an arch over the fire place holding aloft Christmas cards bringing warm wishes to all. The novelty sized leg of ham has been coated with 7 layers of honey glaze and been baked to perfection in the oven. The wreathe on the front door shines like a beacon to those walking by, signalling it’s the season to be good to one another.

Christmas day finally arrives and everyone gathers around the tree after lunch with armchairs given out on a strictly oldest first basis. Someone is presented with a gift. Eyes are as sharp as a hawks as the person gently shakes the gift to listen for any additional clues – the crowd hushes.

They delicately and deliberately run a finger under the wrapping-paper edge, opening the gift slowly so as to build the anticipation in the room. People make amusing suggestions as to what might be inside;

“It’s a book” someone yells,

“ No, no, it’s a pair of socks” another adds. It is clearly neither of these things.

You watch the person’s face, as they get to the business end of the unwrapping. They add that they ‘Wonder what it could be’ and look around the room to see eyes burning into the package. Wanting, yearning, needing to know what is inside. The person folds back the last piece of wrapping paper to reveal their prize. It’s now time for the real Christmas show to begin. The person has received a terrible present and has realised it’s time to win that Oscar they never wanted. A worthy performance given after receiving a less than impressive gift can save a marriage, a friendship, or even a family.

Why do people put their loved ones in such a predicament at Christmas? When only very few people can successfully act their way out of this potentially explosive situation. Pick the gift that cannot fail, a gift that lets someone special know that you care about them enough not to make them act on Christmas. On-deck shorts for dad, beachin’ singlet for bro, retro-wrap dress for mum and whoa-man shorts for sis. Uncles, Aunties, Cousins and grandparents alike all get a bucket hat – simple, practical and with a fail rate so low it’s almost like you read their minds and already knew what they wanted.

So make life easy on friends and family this year – give them the gift they always wanted, but just didn’t know it yet – Towel Clothing.

Your welcome, and Merry Christmas,
Terrence Towel.

 
11 Aug '10

Film Night in June

Posted by Michael Starke

Dear Terrence Towel trend-setters, comfort merchants and people who need regular drying alike,

I would like to tell you a little story if you could spare just two minutes of your time.

A little while ago I went to see a film - Toy Story 3.  It was a good film.  It had all the old characters as I remembered with Woody and Buzz again tremendously voiced by Tom Hanks and Tim Allen.  It had been roughly 11 years since the last Toy Story film hit the big screen and it had lost none of its charm.  The characters were well constructed, the storyline impeccable and plenty of clever humour to go straight over the kids heads in the front row and keep the adults in the back chortling and guffawing.  It was the only film ever given 5 stars by the Triple j reviewer, which is what prompted me to see it in the first place.  I sat there watching this amazing 3D masterpiece unfold in front of my eyes yet a single thought, nay, feeling resonated in my mind and body; 

‘I can’t believe how comfortable I am right now’

I was wearing a Terrence Towel pleasure-suit, red Trackies with a silver grey Hoodie.  My friend to my right was also wearing a towel pleasure-suit although he had chosen a striking combination of Blue Steel Trackies and the same silver grey Hoodie up top.

As I strolled through the Jam-Factory, I felt smug.  But not the smug I’m sure comes with being the best looking person at a whole party, the richest person in the room or having the hottest girlfriend sitting outside at a Southbank cafe.  The smugness I felt far-outweighed any of these materialistic, narcissistic or shallow concerns.  I was smug because I knew, categorically and without question that I was - in the worst-case scenario – 94% more comfortable than everyone else I saw.

Which basically brings me to the fatal flaw of towel clothing, devastating as it is.  Towel clothing will make the rest of your wardrobe feel like you are pulling on a jacket made of nails, pants made from a door-mat or a jumper made from steel-wool.  For this we apologise.

 

You’re Welcome,

 

Terrence Towel.


27 Nov '09

Terrence Blog

Posted by Hugh Campbell

Finally, after months of rhetoric and promises, the garments you have been waiting for have arrived. The garments came off the production line just over a month ago and we have been trying to hustle them on to our unsuspecting friends and family ever since.

Much like Willy Wonka before him, Terrence Towel opened the gates to his luxurious abode and invited one and all to partake in some summer satisfaction. Two launch parties were held at Towel Manor to herald the emergence of the uniquely Australian brand. The ingredients were simple but successful: Towel, sunshine, pool, beverages and beats. Terrence used these launch parties as a way to gauge the response of the public to our towel garments. Fortunately, reactions were really positive despite the public relations nightmare of losing three customers down the chocolate river.

From these two early parties, sales have started to gain momentum. We have even had a few customers come in who we didn’t know directly which was exciting.

Speaking of exciting, Terrence has been working around the clock to ensure the timely unveiling of its website. Each of the Terrence boys spend at least three full days a week on towel related work to keep the wheels in motion. Michael, with his background in Banking & Finance and Accounting, is the businessman of the operation. Rowan’s background of Banking & Finance makes him the ‘get the job done’ man. Hugh’s background in Mechanical Engineering and Finance makes him the work experience kid. He does however hold ambitions of becoming Junior Vice-President.

The website contains wonders unlike anything you could possibly imagine. Unless you can imagine luxurious and eye-catching garments made from the finest towel available, in which case you will find wonders exactly like what you can imagine.

Now that the fashion label has achieved internet availability, all indications point to towel becoming more popular than Oprah Winfrey. With this in mind, it is best to get in early to secure your purchase because you don’t want to be the only person at book club not draped in towel.

One such indication of Terrence’s appeal comes in the form of the great Shane Keith Warne. Michael and Rowan were minding their own business when the Sheik of Tweak sidled up to them and asked for an autograph. Reluctantly they agreed, and despite being there to see Tiger, they ended up having a yarn to the greatest spin bowler of all time. Inevitably, conversation careered toward the delightful canary yellow towel shorts that Michael was wearing. When the great man’s eyes came to rest on the garment, he was heard to exclaim: “Oh, they’re bloody good, ey?”. Amen Warnie, amen.

Michael, Rowan and Hugh are just young kids trying to make their way in life. That way is towel, may you relish it as much as they do. We only ask that you enjoy your Terrence responsibly and without moderation.

Before finishing this instalment of the Terrence blog, we leave you with a comment from one of our many customers:
“Thank god for towel, but I thank you Terrence for turning that towel into incredible shorts” (J. Marton).

Keep an eye out for more blogs coming soon.

You’re Welcome

14 Nov '09

Welcome to the Terrence Store

Posted by Michael Starke

Welcome to our online store!

We will be updating the site with new products over the coming weeks, please check back to see our fantastic product range.

Terrence